As I listen yesterday to a couple of college students have a conversation my heart began to hurt. I, at 38, feel like I have a lot of this figured out already. I have been there. I have felt it before too. However, I feel like since I don't feel that way as often anymore that it doesn't exist.
Yesterday was a real eye opener that it surely does still exist and it needs to stop.
I feel like I could be part of the cause, really. I do it too. I post the highlights of my life and not many low. I filter pictures and take good angle shots. I look excited and happy most of the time. I feel like I contribute to this and it is starting to disgust me.
The comparison trap. The judgement hook. It is alarming. No wonder the anxiety of today's teens and college students is up so high. Not to mention the adults in the world that suffer from depression as well.
She shows me a picture of this girl. She is super thin, super tan and has perfect hair, skin and basically everything. She says "I want to look like that." I look at her in her eyes and I say "you are perfect just the way you are". I want to hug her.
Does she realize that the girl in the picture "the super model" has issues too? Does she realize that even if you lose all the weight and get a spray tan you will still have times of sadness? Does she realize that as you grow older your looks will not even matter?
It is true. Your looks will not be with you forever no matter how beautiful you are. Being a size one does not mean life will be perfect sweet girl. It just doesn't. I know we see this and hear it all the time but do you believe it? Do you? Do you believe that the girl with the model body is not any happier than you are? She is not.
I don't know her. I don't know the model that looks happy all the time. Maybe she is happy and her life is great. I hope so. What I do know though is that if all you are doing in your life is comparing and trying to be someone else you will never feel content or at peace. You just won't.
How can we teach these young people to just let go of all of this. To stop wanting to be the skinny, tan model? Why has society been battling with this issue for so long and nothing has really changed...it only gets worse. How can we teach them that they are perfect how they are. They are different and unique. How can we share with them that they are living in the good years right now and to not waste them by being unhappy with not being the model on Instagram?
I told her first, unfollow the girl that makes you feel that way. No disrespect to her but if it is causing you that much pain just hit unfollow. Next. Repeat to yourself that you are beautiful, happy, content, loved. Repeat those words out loud in the mirror. If you feel uncomfortable that means it is working. One day you will believe it. Of course I told her to feed her body with only the best and to exercise. The work though, it starts from within. If we don't teach them, who will? However, if we don't think it ourselves how can we teach?
Do you believe you are beautiful, strong and enough? If not you need to start. It starts with you who are reading this. No one person can help everyone, but everyone can help someone. The effect will go on but it starts with you.
Help me spread the word once and for all that beauty does not lie on the outside. Beauty lies within. If you feel good, make good choices and live a REAL life.....no one can take your confidence away from you. Not even the size 1, tan super model on the beach.
I am strong. I am confident. I am happy. I am content. I am at peace. I know that I am made to be just who I am and I will continue to live out my most authentic life by being good to myself and to all of creation around me. I will live in the present moment. I know that tomorrow and yesterday do not exist, only the right now. I understand that if I react to negative energy I give it power. I will be slow to react today and insanely picky as to who and what thoughts I let in my heart and mind. I will not give my power away today. I will teach everyone around me how to do the same by living out these intentions for myself.
Peace within me Peace all around me.. BE LIGHT SEE LIGHT.
Four kids....tummy control....DON't Be fooled ya'll....I have loose, saggy skin and I am damn proud this body carried 4 kids and 1 angel baby